THE ANGEL THAT TOUCHED MY HEAD.

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chronic illness

A heart warming and courageous story about a ten year old boy with a  chronic illness who experienced a man who changed his life forever, while laying in a hospital bed in a coma. Often bullied and tired of suffering, Brad asks the question many of us do when we don’t understand…Why me? See how his mom helps him to cope during the really difficult days when he was in pain, his sisters strength and courage, his friends love for him and what happen to him.  Available on http://amazon.com/author/leonahollis1635 and from OutSkirtspress.com by Author Leona Hollis. 

 

THE ANGEL THAT TOUCHED MY HEAD

This is the title of my latest book that I’ve written which you can find on Amazon.com or you can order a copy at OutSkirtspress.com. I wrote this book especially for children with long term illnesses such as cancer etc. It’s to give them hope to never give up and for parents to be that source of courage and strength for their children in their darkest hours, to know that there is hope… even when hope seems impossible.

A few years ago my son was very sick and had to be hospitalized. He couldn’t hold down anything at all. No water, no food, nothing at all.

It started suddenly and we didn’t really know what it was, that brought this sudden attack of chronic vomiting on. As a mother, I was used to my children getting sick, so this was nothing for me to make a major crisis of. I mean I wasn’t a new mom so I already knew pretty much what to do when my children got sick.

However, this was not the norm for my son. It was now 2 days and he was still vomiting profusely and running a low grade fever at this point. I knew I had to take him to the hospital. We took him to the hospital and after 10hrs of being in the emergency room we knew it wasn’t good. The doctors finally came and told us they were going to have to keep him.

For 9 days he was in the hospital with no signs of getting better. By this time he was Bradycardic, his blood pressure extremely low, he lost a substantial amount of weight and he looked like a zombie. His eyes were sunken in and extremely dark, his skin very pale, as he often complain about how hungry he was. He couldn’t even hold the IVY fluids in his system.

The doctors got to the point where they wanted to perform surgery, by cutting him open, to see what was wrong.

As a christian mother, I knew the power of prayer, so I prayed for my son and while he was laying in the hospital and God healed him. Suddenly, one day he asked for something to eat while laying in his hospital bed. I asked the doctors to please give him something to eat. Reluctantly they gave him something light and he ate it without throwing it up. That afternoon he had dinner with no trouble. That night, he had a snack with no problem. He was released from the hospital and from that point on he never had that problem ever again.

The story of The Angel That Touched My Head is a story about a 10yr old boy who battled a chronic long term illness. He was often bullied st school at times because of it and his twin sister had to challenge him to stand up for himself. He was often hospitalized, which caused him to ask his mother the question many of us adults ask in times of suffering….why me?.

He often wondered, if it was because of little naughty things he did that caused “God to punish him”. One day he fell and went into a coma. While in the coma a very tall man paid him a visit that changed his life for ever.

I believe in miracles. I believe in hope. I believe in possibilities and you should too. If you are a parent with a sick child or know someone with a very sick child, I encourage you to buy a copy of The Angel That Touched My Head. Read it for yourself first and through a parent’s eyes you will know what it’s like through the eyes of your child if ever they found themselves in a position of being chronically ill. It will teach other children compassion, mercy for others who are less fortunate in terms of sickness and how to appreciate our children whether they are sick or healthy.

Money does not make a person excellent…their mindset does. A mind that is geared toward excellence will work toward excellence.

The mistake is not what what we feel…it’s what we did with what we felt long ago when we knew it was never suppose to be.

STAY OFF THAT LEG UNTIL YOU’RE HEALED

Devine is an amazing dancer. I got the chance to see her dance before and she was great; so when my Junior class for the VBS wanted to do a dance for the closing program on Sunday, I knew exactly who to turn to…Devine. I asked her if she could teach and choreograph 5 of my  students some steps to Lee Ann Womack “I Hope You Dance” and she said yes.

She was a life saver because I didn’t know what to do with the class.

For the last two weeks we’ve been staying late rehearsing and practicing. I watched astoundingly, as she took 5 inexperienced, amateur students and began to transform them into dancers. They weren’t as good as she was  and for the first week it looked like I was going to have to make some changes to the program. It didn’t seem like they were going to learn the dance in the short amount of time that we had left.

I usually don’t make it to the class on Tuesdays and Thursdays but I knew that time was of the essence if we were going to successful pull this so I decided to go in on Tuesday. Watching and waiting for my students to become close to professionals was nerve wrecking. Well I knew they’d never become professionals overnight but Lawd knows I wanted them to become at least something by Sunday, and Devine was going to make it happen. At least I hoped.

There were days where my lead dancer had her little attitude and wasn’t trying to dance with life and enthusiasm.  The other days  two other dancers who were partners weren’t getting along one blaming the other for missteps. Then other days where my other dancers  were just nonchalant about the whole regime.

My dream of having this amazing performance was beginning to look like a nightmare and I was beginning to be discouraged. 

Then… a ray of hope.  It was time for rehearsal and I almost fell out as I watched my dancers do their thang. They were dancing and twirling and putting their all into it. I was so proud and so happy. Then my heart sank. Devine walked in with a bandage wrapped around her leg. I asked her what happened, she  said injured her leg playing soccer. My first reaction was like…soccer….what the heck…why in the world are you playing soccer when you have to teach my class. What are they going to do now especially since she had taught them a new move that they were still struggling with.

Of course I didn’t verbalize my thoughts knowing that I wasn’t paying her to teach my class to dance, so I asked if she was ok and she yes.

Although Devine was doing a great job working with my students, at some point she began to be in discomfort as her leg started bothering her. I didn’t want her to exert anymore pressure on it so I told her she might just want to get off the leg and ease up on it a bit. My students were fine and knew what to do at this point.

Devine deserves to be commended for her commitment to my class indeed.

Sometimes in life we are hurt and wounded and we need to get off that leg and heal. Get away from the people that are chronically wounding your heart.  You can live without them. Remove yourself from the situation and those people that don’t value you, your gifts and talents, your opinions or your heart and take your time and heal. 

When we are hurt physically or emotionally, it takes time and great care to be healed. It’s very imperative that we understand that the only way to be healed and whole is to walk in wisdom. So get off that leg and get healed.  Let go of whoever you have to let go of and be at peace with that decision if it’s in your best interest emotionally. You owe it to yourself and your peace of mind.

OUT OF THE BOX. ONE MAN’S BLAH…IS ANOTHER MAN’S… WOW!

I have a problem with order sometimes. Not breaking the rules as in going against the company’s protocol, or the churches by laws etc but always having to follow traditionalism as the only way of doing things, for it to be successful. Traditionalism has it’s place in life and for the most part, many love the traditional way of doing things, but hey, listen, we live in the twenty first century right. It appears that the theme for the twenty first century is, when in “Roman, do as the Romans do.” Trending is what most people follow today whether it’s good or bad. I mean, when you can get the President of the United States Of America taking a selfie and enjoying it….well you get my point.

It’s funny how even in between writings, someone will stop just to post on social media, something like, #writingthisblog..#butfirstletmetakeaselfie, with a picture of them writing their blog.

I too have jumped on the selfie bandwagon, often struggling time to time to get a clear good shot of myself. My kids refuses to take selfies with me. To them it is so not cool “for moms.”

 We are in the era  of “good/bad rebels” breaking the rules of what is consider success, how it looks, speaks, dress etc.  They are branding themselves and lo and behold the multitudes are loving them. I’m not a trend follower per se. I jump on the bandwagon depending on what it is. I hate following the crowd most of the times. Everyone always seem to look like, act like, talk like and be like the rest. To me it leaves little to no room for authenticity. Which makes it hard to know people’s genuine self.

        Sometimes monkey see….monkey do isn’t always good.

It takes courage to be yourself and flow in your own lane not knowing whether you will be loved, rejected, praised or thrashed. People will either love you as is, or you’ll have to make some adjustments to accommodate  who you are as a person, to their taste and liking.

And to think that you have to change who you are as a person, your taste, personality, how you dress etc for others but sometimes you have to. You have to change your appearance for certain jobs. You have to change your appearance to go to certain places to meet certain people. It is what it is. Changing these minor things isn’t changing your personality. It’s simply making temporary adjustments for the time being.

The people that are drawn to you, may very well be called to you and what your purpose is in life. 

To one person you may never be good enough for their circle or even to be in their presence. They may never see your brilliance, your creativity, your cleverness etc. To them you may be…blah, but to someone else you may be a… wow. He’s amazing. She’s amazing. They are brilliant. 

At the end of the day when you look at the history makers, they weren’t just average people. They were brilliance hidden in ordinary who  weren’t afraid to be their authentic selves. 

Sometimes you have to break the rules of tradition….in order to be triumphant.

IN THE MIDST OF THE STORM

When I first saw her, I thought to myself, wow… she’s so pretty. She was rather slim but shapely at the same time. Her braided hair, flowing casually past her shoulders, framed her small but pretty face. She had a great smile as well. 

A few months later, I sat in one of the pews in my former church only to see what appeared to be the same replica of the woman I saw, however, it wasn’t her….it was her twin. WOW! I thought to myself. Twins. They looked so much alike yet they were not identical but fraternal. As the years past, I became very close friends with these two pretty girls who would encounter some very terrible tragedies in life but would fight back and overcome until the very end.

Isn’t it amazing that strangers become friends all the time every where we go.

Like magnet that attracts metal, some how our souls seems to connect to something within others that draws us magnetically to them. 

Some say it’s divine connection.

Divine connection indeed. A divine connection that connected our hearts. She was one of the best person you could ever meet. So kind and generous though greatly misunderstood at times. She never failed to help others when they needed her the most. She’d travel far or near to help her friends. I had so much respect for her. She had a good heart. She loved hard…but her hard love… was soft. It was that softness that would cause her to be used and abused by so many throughout the years. She was generous. Maybe too generous at times. But it was just her heart. She was one of those kind…..you know the kind. The kind with the good heart that always seem to get taken advantage of. If nice girls finished last, as some say of nice guys, she’d be the nice girl that end up last.

I watched throughout the years as these sisters encountered storm after storm. The pressing  and beating of the storms of rejection. The pressing and beating of the storms of being taken advantage of. The pressing and beating of the storms of jealousy because of what God was doing in their lives.  The pressing and beating of the storms of being lied to and abandoned. The pressing and beatings of the storms of sickness, and then..the storm stopped raging for one of them. Suddenly a calm……the silence of death. Her sister has died of cancer.

And now, one sister is gone and the other one finds herself in the midst of the storm. She is thrust into motherhood having no children of her own, right after a broken engagement that led to almost being married which she canceled. She is in a new position on a new job, a new relationship, only to find out a few months later that she had a lump in her breast.

It gets worst.

She finds out the lump in her breast isn’t cancerous, but her father is diagnosed with cancer and has died. While going through the trauma of his death, she gets a phone call that her nephew has been shot, while her other brother has been hospitalized and is very sick. How much can one person bare.

While caring for her niece she suddenly finds herself in a custody battle that was uncalled for, not even 2 weeks after her father’s death.

But if you would see this beautiful woman while all this was happening to her you would know that there is a God. You see, like myself, my friend is also a christian. Her strength to stand strong and courageously in the midst of the storm doesn’t come from herself. 

God is the source of her strength. He is the strength of her life.

While the winds and the waves beat vehemently against her…she is rooted and grounded in her faith in God. She knows, that it’s nothing but the grace of God that has sustained her, comfort her, empowered her, strengthened her and has tremendously blessed life her in spite of it all.

Strength is not always in numbers per se, but strength can be found in the ones that stand alone sometimes looking the storms of life straight in the face declaring, you will not defeat me. 

Today my friend is happy. Though her life isn’t perfect and she wish many of the things she went through didn’t happen, she knows there is always a purpose to everything. She’s found love, life is good and she looks forward to seeing the great things the future has in store for. I

I pray this blog message encourages someone to know that life doesn’t have to defeat you. You can feel like you are loosing in life but if you see the good in the midst of the bad, you’ll see you’re not loosing and when it’s all over, you’ll see what you gained in spite of what you may have lost. Something good will come out of your bad situation. 

THE FRUSTRATION OF DESIRES CONCERNING YOUR DREAMS AND VISIONS

It’s hard to have dreams and visions, desires to do or become but connected to the wrong people. Often times the challenge to pursue our dreams and visions, coincide with the conflict of opposition because of our associations and connections. Whether the frustrations of desires come from the stumbling blocks of constant negativity from friends or family or just our own laziness, it’s quite discouraging at times.

Excellence should be pursued but never with mediocrity as it’s partner. Mediocrity is comfortable with ease.

Sometimes we want others to join with us in the pursuit of our dreams and visions. We want them to see what we see and we hope that if they can see  what we see, they’d be supportive and encouraging…. but things don’t always work out that way.

When I wrote my first book “Even Roses Have Thorns” I thought the contents within the pages were so revelatory and brilliant that others would see what I saw.

It was quite heart breaking instead to hear all the negativism coming from people that I thought would support me. What was even worst was when the book was finally published no one that I knew brought a copy of it to even write a review for me.

It was a devastating blow that broke my heart. The people that I gave honorary mentions  to, those who I admired and respected, the ones that I felt surely were worthy of being mentioned didn’t even buy a copy.

I’ve always been the type to support and celebrate others but it wasn’t happening for me in spite of being a “supportive friend to others”.

Just because you’ve been supportive to someone over there….doesn’t mean that same action is going to be reciprocated over here. However, support is never given without a return. The Law of Reciprocity works in such a way that you’re going to reap what you sow. That’s why I strive to always do good to others.

One night I was talking to a friend. We had a few issues in our friendship a while back and I asked her…why didn’t she didn’t buy a copy of my book. I mean… that’s what friends do right? They get excited about their friends accomplishments and begin to spread the word excitedly to friends of friends.  I would think that we would want our friends to succeed.

She said to me, “I couldn’t celebrate you…. because you were doing things that I’ve never done”.

I said to her, ” I’ve always encouraged you and everyone to pursue your dreams, go for what’s in your heart and was willing to support you however which way I could”.

Her response, “I know but I guess I was too lazy and not willing to do the work”.

The frustration of our desires have to deal with these real life issues. Wanting so much for others that they don’t seem to want for themselves, or they want it but don’t want to do the work for it… while trying to pursue your dreams having to fight against oppositions and discouragements along the way..

Sometimes you become the bad person when you want more than those that are around you.

I’m reminded of the story of The Little Red Hen. No one wanted to help her with the preparations of baking the bread but everybody wanted a piece of it when it was finished. When you can’t convince others to stand with you or join with you….then you must convince them through your actions to believe that all things are possible.

Sometimes the only motivation others will eventually gain…is the passion that they see in you that turned that frustration into fruition. When they finally see you’re moving forward without them and making your dreams come through, perhaps you will be the source of courage that they never had and the confidence that they need.

Do it for you…do it for them.

YOUR LIGHT WAS BLINDING ME

One of my original poems from my  collection

YOUR LIGHT WAS BLINDING ME

I noticed you from afar you were shining brightly even in the dark
I tried to get near but had much fear your light was blinding me
It was your smile that was dazzling that wonderful personality
You were simply amazing
Your creativeness and unique ability
Yes your light was blinding me

I was bitter a bit by your confidence I couldn’t celebrate you I was a bit tense
I saw something in you that I wanted for me but your light was blinding me

Your gentleness and forgiving spirit your power to forgive others you had it
That strength that I lacked and passion and pride
The courage to stand when others would hide
Your light was blinding me

Your determination when others would quit, it was custom made for you it was your fit
You embraced your inner self never competed with others ‘your self esteem infected others
Your light was blinding me

And as the days and months and years passed by
I had to approach you I could no longer hide
So I put on my sunglasses as I drew near
I had to meet you in spite of my fears

Your brightness shines from your inner beauty
That drew me like an insect truly
That light that others saw in you
It was that light that drew me too

And as I drew near what I felt was true
Your sweetness and love was genuine too
Your light was not what was blinding me
It was just my fears and insecurities

 

When you put on…

When you put on the garment of courage, you can skip the accessory of fear and concern of people’s opinion because they don’t match your outfit of confidence.